An awkward conversation, with myself
For a little over a week I have been grappling with the depth of the concept, ‘whatever we dislike in others can be found in ourselves’. I have always understood the concept but in a general way, because I wholeheartedly embrace that when others see beauty in us, it is a reflection of themselves.
I was scrolling through social media when a post caused me to pause and think about a recent conversation I had. A conversation which, looked at in hindsight, was riddled with behaviours on my part that I often condemn in others. I dredged up the distant past to explain a current situation, I was insistent that my analysis of the situation was accurate and I minimized the humanity of the subject of my ire.
Did I think that my perspective was based on empirical data? Yes!
Did I think I was being unfair? No?
Did I want to the listener to hear and understand me? Yes!
This made me realise that the person who profoundly irritates me when they do the same thing is probably coming from the same place.
I can’t remember which course taught me that when someone keeps revisiting an issue it means that they haven’t healed from it yet, whether circumstances have changed or not. However, it is a perspective that I shall certainly try to hold onto in order to practice grace with others and myself.